moon, mutable orb
pitch ceaselessly waxes, wanes
tides ever tuning
~
I love to revisit old work and see what I might tease from it. Is this an improvement or something entirely new? I’ll let you decide. The original:
A Lunar Haiku
light, vacillating
orb waxes, fills, wanes, renews
still, daily moves tides
~
Play on, fellow wordsmiths.
~ Tanya
as always: photo and words©️2024 Tanya Cliff
Both haiku. Very lovely. Interesting maturation. Hard to say the second is an improvement, but that’s my impression. Thank you!
Hi Kevin! Thank you. I’m leaning towards the second being something different, playing on the rhythm of nature as a musical metaphor. Still pondering…😊